senior year: the beginnings

It's a month into senior year, and there have been a lot of firsts.

The first day of senior year.
The first time I parked in the seniors' row of the parking lot.
The first senior party.
The first time I stepped foot in a Calculus class.
The first time I got to leave class five minutes early for break and lunch.
The first time someone asked me what college I was going to attend.
And the first time my actions were justified with the phase "because I'm a senior."

While there are many firsts, there are also many last.

My last first day of high school.
My last high school cheer camp.
My last opening game of football season.
My last time having long bus rides with the soccer team.
And there are so many more lasts to come.

While I'm the first one to say I'm ready to leave high school, I guess I'm saying all this to remind myself to cherish the moments while they are still here. I can't take life for granted.

People keep telling me I'll remember this year forever, and maybe I will. Despite my reservations to still being in high school, I have so much hope for this school year. And it is the vision of myself walking across the stage and receiving my diploma that keeps me going. The past four years of high school couldn't have all been for nothing.

My classmates are all pretty laid back. We squash our drama among ourselves, and generally keep to ourselves. We bicker with each other. We complain about each other. But at the end of the day, we take up for each other. The class is basically that dysfunctional family with people in it that you don't want to claim, but you know you have to.  I'm pretty sure we are the class that everyone wishes they were in, but doesn't want to admit it;)

This year I want to laugh, cry, hope, and dream.
I want to feel alive in a time where it's so easy to forget how fortunate we really are. I want to make memories-- the kinds that adults say you never forget. I want to learn, grow, and find myself even more than I already have. Because honestly I don't think we ever have it figured out, some people are just better at pretending they have. "Fake it 'til you make it." That's the motto, right.

Well we will see how the next 9 months go...
 

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